Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
