Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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