Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
