these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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