Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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