lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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