That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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