Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
