i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
