I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
