I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
