we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize