is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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