wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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