Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize