I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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