I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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