And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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