So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
