doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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