Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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