we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
