Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
