He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
