Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
