I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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