And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
