So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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