He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
