i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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