I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
