Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
