Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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