alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
