She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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