kristin has been a bad kristin
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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