I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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