I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
