no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
