So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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