I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
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