he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You're like the curious george of whores
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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