She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
