This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
