BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
