4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize