it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
