you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
