This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
