big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Randomize
